MEOW! My name is June Buggie, and I have something to say.
Yeah, I know, it’s been awhile. This moving thing weighed on an elder cat like me, and it took longer to rejuvenate. But after reading about this on the Internet, I think I’m ready for action.
It seems that in July of 2012, a group of prominent scientists got together to determine if animals are conscious. WHAT?
Oh yeah, these humans looked at “the neurobiological substrates of conscious experience and related behaviors in human and non-human animals.” And as their little party ended, they signed a declaration that yes, non-human animals are conscious, or can, in the words of keynote speaker Christoff Koch, “feel something, anything — whether it’s the sensation of an azure-blue sky, a tooth ache, being sad, or worrying about the deadline two weeks from now.” (Ian Somerhalder Foundation website)
First of all, what took you so long? It’s not like animals are new to the scene. Actually, some of us have been around much longer than you have.
Second, who says you get to decide if we’re conscious or not? You think that since you have no hair and opposable thumbs, you get you determine if we measure up to your rigorous standards?
And, most importantly, now that you humans HAVE decided we’re conscious, why haven’t you changed your way of treating us? I still see you have grocery carts filled with our body parts and you have no clue where it came from or how it was obtained. You keep stealing our habitat because, while you feel it’s important to preserve endangered species, that only happens if it’s not inconvenient for you to do so- and it’s ALWAYS inconvenient for you to do so.
Oh, and let’s talk about this ownership thing. You think you can OWN dogs and cats, and since we’re domesticated, we let you get away with thinking that. But then there are clowns like Arizona Cardinals football player Darnell Dockett, who bought himself a tiger cub to have as a pet, and plans to bring it to training camp one day. Loser! Both the idiot Dockett and the team for allowing him to bring it to camp. Where do you get off thinking you should be able to “own” an undomesticated animal.
You humans are exasperating!
So congratulations, humans, on your accomplishment. I’m sure you’re all proud of yourselves.
But I’d be much more impressed if you didn’t just TALK about our consciousness… you also HONORED and RESPECTED our consciousness.